I wish i could move to the future now...forgetting the past....my past is haunting me... I realized that i can't let go..what should i do... All these while i've been telling myself a big lie...I'm telling myself i'll be fine, i'll forget everything and move on...I need to learn that and i need to do need fast before it start to hurt someone i love.......

I've been having difficulty to breath normally...It started few years back... What happen to me? Am i tension? stress out? I don't know...or maybe i'm having some kind of health problem....I think i should go for body check up...But i'm too scared ...... mmmm.....
Will do so soon.....

I found myself a new hobby....hehehe...Knitting! Thanks to my aunt who teach me how to knit.
I'm now knitting a scarf for myself...It's a bit "cacat" but i'm very happy because it's my first production ! Hahaha... After this i will knit for my mum and others too.... :)

I become jobless again...mm..i don't know whether i'm doing the right thing or not. Being jobless for 2 weeks now. Already sent out all my resume but untill now no news. What's wrong with me? I really can't figure out. Yes, i'm a fresh grad with no experiences.... I'm feel a bit regret for taking master. I would have work almost 2 years with plenty of experiences if i wouldn't have further my studies.

Previous job does not suit me at all plus i hate working with that kind of people with such attitudes (back stabbing their own emplyee). I feel really relieve after quiting the job. But now feel the tension coming up coz i'm still unemployed plus uni students are coming out in no time. The competition is competitive now....... everyone is looking for job.......

I was wondering..... is it working life suit me or just stay at home suit me more....... mmmmmm.......
But i really wan to work ....till now no chance...... and Please no sales job anymore !

There are so many things running through my mind now but i can't say it out. Feel so neglected these days. Really hurt whenever i out with them. It's not like it used to be. Is it i change ? or is it they change? or is it nobody change but i just being too sensitive. Whatsoever....... I wanted to tell them but i can't. They might think i'm childish but maybe is true. I just think too much sometimes but i really can feel the different. Whenever i'm out with them, i feel lost...as if i'm in my own world and they are in their world... i can't get the signal anymore..it felt so far away....what can i do?? i just hope i can disappear forever.... let them be in their world forever and i'm in mine. *sighed*

Do i have friends? The answer is " Yes, i do"...but do i have "true" friends?? Well, i can't said i have or i don't have. What does it means by "true" friends? Is he/she the one that you can count on it? or is he/she the one that can share everything with you? ? mmm...it's hard to find one... some people are selfish... they want all their friends to befriended only to them... they are not willing to share their friends...it's so hard to explain.... hate them, love them or just don't bother about them..that's what i'm thinking about it...

Sometimes friends tend to neglect you... sometimes i do neglect my friends... i tried my best to maintain the relationship between my friends...but it's getting hard when only one party involved. Sometimes i want to call a person up and say hello....but sometimes we don't.. we think about it...why he / she never call us at all instead we are the one calling he/she all this while.... sometimes maybe he/she are busy with work/ studies/ or anything.... maybe i complain too much...maybe i'm the one to be blamed as well because maybe they're assuming what i'm assuming now... mmmm

but at least i got one person that i can really rely on... that i can tell share my stories/ problems with...but not all laa...coz i don want her to worry too much... The person is my mum... she is my best best friend in the world.. love you mum.... :)


so if you have friends ... just call them and say a simple hello... this will brighten their day.. a simple hello means a thousand words... at least you are not forgotten.....
haha...i'm going to call / msg my friends tonight just to say hello...

Been so lazy these days..Just stay at home online, eat, sleep.. etc. etc... Luckily i still got my favourite past time. I did a few cards..but unfortunately i can't post up the picture because my camera is not with me...Will post up soon...and i'm still making those card...sending to my friends.... :)

I just sent one today..hopefully the person who received it will be happy... (i didn't manage to take a photo of that card.... :( ...never mind, i still remember how it look like..hahaha)..
Will send another card again next week.... Be prepare to receive it my friends.... Love u all....

Here are some of the cards that i made....